Appointment

8 February 2011

Dear Dad,

It was good to see you this morning, Thank you for the car... it's perfect, as I knew it would be, you'd cleaned it, vacuumed it and made if perfect for me. It still scares the shit out of me that you've given me your trusty and much loved Toyota but I'll look past that and just thank you for the gift.

Thank you

So you had your oncologist appointment this morning. I wanted to go with you, but you know how stubborn you are. Fair enough I guess, it's up to you, and at least you weren't by yourself, Mum was there too. Make sure you ask her if you think you may have missed anything, OK? She's pretty onto it, and she will have a fairly good idea of what was said and what was meant. Or don't be afraid to ask me too OK? even if I don't know Liz won't mind translating Doctor speak for me, she's a good person, and a great friend :)

I gotta tell you, it was a bloody long day waiting to hear from you about your results. I'd tried to text Mum, but she was being frustrating and cryptic, and her being at work meant I couldn't even call her. I think Jenny had herself worked into a state too (you know what we're like... we feed off each other...). I guess I'm really lucky living in town (if that's what you can call Palmerston....) and have friends close enough to walk to and grab a cuppa with, but I think Jen spends a lot of time at her place by herself stressing. Make sure you keep us both in he loop OK?

I so so relieved to hear your voice when you called just after tea. It's a shock that they want you in so fast (tomorrow!) but I'm relieved they're getting onto it so fast, and your oncologist sounds very personable and thorough, just the sort of person I want looking after my Dad. So tomorrow you're in early for a CAT scan, lymph node - ectomy  (this was your word...) and a bone marrow biopsy. And you were told to bring things and expect to stay. I can't tell you how relieved I am that you're so positive and pro active about heading into the unknown. I know you must be shitting bricks about it, but the only way you're gonna win this war is by fighting it and getting the best help possible, and you're attitude will go a long way into winning this, keep it up!

I still had a big sooky last night after talking to you though. It's fucking terrifying, and being home alone so much doesn't help. It's exhausting trying to keep it all stuffed down and bottled up so I don't freak out the kids with constant sniffling or add any undue pressure to Mike when his exam's on Friday. Thank god for Emma, Liane and Kate for letting me bleat on via facebook. Especially Emma, she kindly lets me wah on almost every night. Mike should bloody send her flowers for taking the pressure off him.

I'm in town tomorrow anyway for some last minute things before I start course, so I'll pop into the hospital and see how you are. I would drop you off a cell phone but you know... the less said about your technology ability the better LOL

Keep strong Dad, and I'll see you tomorrow once the medical juggernaut has started

Love Cath xo